Does Billy Ray Cyrus sleep at night?

So I watched 10 minutes of a Hollywood show on E television last night. The first story was about Miley Cyrus (aka: Hannah Montana). She talked about her mega hot tour and denied rumors that she’s in love with a Jonas Brother. They showed the Jonas Brothers, otherwise I wouldn’t have known what a ‘Jonas Brother’ was. She seemed like a nice, well grounded kid..and yes, I say kid (eventhough she’s already made more money than all of us combined) because she’s under 18.

The next story that comes on is about Britney Spear’s latest exploits. Apparently she’s dating a papparazzi, who already is talking in the media about selling naked pics of Britney…and is rumored to have filmed a sex tape with Brit. Anyway, Britney and this guy are being filmed in a drug store shopping for pregnancy tests. Only the whole thing turns out to be a hoax. I’m sure a lot of you are aware of this story, especially if you are a regular reader of PerezHilton like Bond. But the point isn’t this particular story, it’s just that Britney Spears life keeps getting more and more bazaar. I mean sure it was likely that she’d wind up ‘white trash’ since she grew up in Louisiana. But when she made all of that money early in her career with her squeeky clean teen pop, I figured maybe she had saved herself from a normal wt chick’s life of booze, menthol cigarettes, belly button rings, lower back tats, waitressing, and multiple kids with different Dads. But look how crazy Britney is now…it really is startling.

So if you are the father of the current queen of teen pop, Miley Cyrus. Do you think Billy Ray Mullet gets even a wink of sleep at night? Does he stay up worrying about whether Miley will follow the path of Britney, Paris & Nicole? Or does he sleep like a baby after counting all of the money that his daughter is bringing in?

Billy Ray Cyrus and his teen daughter Miley Cyrus

Hey Billy Ray, pay attention. This is what Britney Spears used to look like when she was sweet & innocent.

This is Britney in 2007.

Be scared Billy Ray…very, very afraid. You might consider locking the doors at night to make sure Miley doesn’t get out.

Which Spice Girl is Hottest?

I’m sure that was a popular question in the 1990’s when the Spice Girls first came out to fame. And now with their reunion tour started I’m bringing it back. So I ask the question which Spice Girl is the hottest?

I must admit that I’ve never been much of a Spice Girls fan. I heard their “Girl Power” songs in the 90’s and was not interested. But today my AIM opened an AOL browser, where I caught a glimpse of the picture below of the Spice Girls recently. And I must admit it peaked my interest. It got me wondering who was the hottest Spice Girl?

First I’m going to eliminate Scary Spice & Sporty Spice, because I don’t think either has ever really been in contention for hottest Spice Girl. And I figured prior to doing a Google image search that Victoria Beckham is the hottest Spice Girl. But after doing some research…I changed my opinion.

Spice Girls Photo from their Reunion Tour. Geri is showing some skin.

Although I’m not a fan of Victoria Beckham (aka: Posh Spices) and her new look. She’s still hot and has a smoking body.

I like Victoria Beckham’s look from a few years back. Long, dark hair is a better look for Posh.

Geri Halliwell - a new contender? I must admit I was impressed with Geri’s body. And I’m a sucker for a pretty red head.

Whoa, Baby Spice (Emma Bunton) has come a long way since the 1990’s. Me likey.

A few more of the sexy pics that Baby Spice has been snapping these days.

So currently the hottest Spice Girl is Emma Bunton (aka: Baby Spice). She’s sculpted her body, and I’ll admit I’m a sucker for blondes as well. But when and if Victoria Beckham ever comes to her senses and quits doing weird shit with her hair, then she will resume the crown of hottest Spice Girl.

Which Spice Girl do you think is the best looking?

Which Pop Star Would You Pick?

All of these women below are now seemingly over-the-hill Pop Stars. But back in 1999, each of these ladies had a top 20 hit on the Billboard’s Top 100 charts.

Now ask yourself two questions:
1) Which would I rather “have” now?
2) Which would I rather have “had” in her prime? (I think Britney & Christina were legal back then)

A) Britney Spears

B) Christina Aguilera

C) Jennifer Lopez

D) Madonna

E) Shania Twain

In-case you can’t recall their ‘99 hits, they were:
#2) “…Baby One More Time” - Britney Spears
#5) “Genie In A Bottle” - Christina Aguilera
#9) “That Don’t Impress Me Much” - Shania Twain
#10) “If You Had My Love” - Jennifer Lopez
#11) “Beautiful Stranger” - Madonna

I think I’ve got go with Britney back in the day. Now, she’s full blown crazy. So I’d probably take Shania. Christina is too short, Madonna has never been attractive to me and I’m afraid JLo is the World’s Biggest Bitch. So I take Shania (today) by default. I hope she still looks as hot as she did back in her early years.

And remember, Britney used to look like this:

Did you watch the MTV Video Music Awards (VMAs) the other night?

Britney bombed. She looked chubby, slow, uncoordinated, and possibly(hopefully) drunk. Back to the drawing to board as far as trying to salvage her career.

Chris Brown gave the best dance performance since Michael Jackson at the Grammys. It was awesome, and I wouldn’t normally say that about any guy dancing on stage. Definitely check it out here. (Link)

Who looked good? Rihanna for sure. But Ashlee Simpson and Jennifer Garner looked the best.

Britney’s butt

Ashlee Simpson - I love the dark eyes. Definitely holds her own vs. Jess these days.

Beyonce - She’s looked better. Very uninspired. She needed to look better on a night that Rihanna was going to get a ton of air time. You just know Jay-Z was like “Damn girl! Why can’t you look more like Rihanna?”

Rosario Dawson - Gorgeous. Who knew? She had never really done much for me.

Megan Fox - Sexy, but seems seems like a contrived, packaged commodity. Nothing real special about her. I think someone just tries to dress her up like Angelina and they tell her how to act sexy.

Jennifer Garner - Sultry! Beautiful eyes and dimples. She seems kind of goofy, and I like that. Not at all full of herself.

Hayden Panetierre - She looks 18, and that’s not a compliment. Though it was funny that they had her in a suite becasue she was too young to be in the casino.

Alicia Keys - Doesn’t do much for me.  Great performance though.

Nelly Furtado - The new hair color has to go, she looks 40 years old

Paris - Looks like my grandma.

Rihanna - Very sexy, love her accent.

Today’s Bond girls…Cavallari, Cuthbert, Simpson or Moore?

Consider this a tribute to Miss Goodnight from Man with the Golden Gun. I’m thinking about my all time favorite Bond girl, Britt Ekland. Halle Berry had nothing on her.

I tried to make this hard, but you tell me. Thinking strictly about their superficial qualities, forget her personality, which of these four ladies would you make your Bond girl for one night?

a. Kristin Cavallari

b. Elisha Cuthbert

c. Ashlee Simpson

d. Mandy Moore

Admittedly these pictures don’t do them justice, but I go A, D, B, C. And if you throw Carrie Underwood into the mix, she goes right to the top.

What Really Happened in Final Sopranos Episode?

Like everyone else watching the final episode of The Sopranos, I was caught off guard by the fade to black. But I didn’t have the reaction most did; questioning whether their cable just cut out. Seeing Meadow’s face as she entered, and then the abrupt cut to black made me think it was intentional. But did I think Tony Soprano got whacked? Not immediately (I’m not that smart). But the next day in being reminded about what Bobby said when they were fishing, “You probably don’t even hear it when it happens, right?”. Then I was pretty sure that Tony Soprano was dead.

David Chase worked every episode of the final season back from the finale. He carefully dropped in clues to lead you to that final scene in the diner. The scene with Bobby was a big clue. But there were plenty of other more subtle items that, like the light in the desert at the end of the peyote scene, that hinted towards the final that was coming.

And Chase worked hard to show that Tony wasn’t a character worthy of being loved, he was a ruthless leader. Chase was trying to conflict people’s feelings towards Tony, with all of the scenes with Dr. Melfi. How Dr. Melfi kept being confronted with the concept that psychopaths used therapy as a way to rationalize their behavior. He also really laid it on thick how pathetic Tony’s life was; he was constantly hiding, being paranoid and being surrounded by losers (his worthless mob crew). In the end Tony’s only really mainstay left is the goofy Paulie Walnuts. All his key guys are gone, and so soon is Tony.

All-in-all, I think David Chase and HBO did a fantastic job in ending The Sopranos. There was no ending that would have satisfied everyone. But the ending he chose leaves the entire subject open to interpretation, which allows everyone to have their own opinion. If you want to read a really great and detailed opinion of the final scene, check out Bob Harris’ take on the final scene.

What’s your opinion of how the Sopranos ended?
Did Tony Soprano get whacked at the end?
Is Meadow Soprano the worst parallel parker in the World?

And remember, don’t stop believing…

Teen Wolf Too - Bask in the Genius

For years I’ve been arguing Teen Wolf Too is the most inspirational, funny, clever, underrated movie of all time.

Let’s break it down.

Arguments against:

1.  Sequels, by nature, suck.  And it’s not like the original Teen Wolf was The Godfather. 

2.  The premise is played out in the first movie.  Okay, we get it, the Wolf learns happiness is being a team player.

3.  It’s almost as if the budget was worse for the sequel. 

4.  Mickey Fox is no De Niro.  And Jake Bateman is no Mickey Fox.

5.  Why boxing?  Why not football or baseball?

The Rebuttal

1.  Flawed line of thinking.  Think if TW2 was actually TW1?  Count the Oscars.  Instead it starts off for most people, before the movie even begins, as a C-.  A sequel to a silly movie and nothing more.  If you showed TW2 to a million people who never saw TW1, well, I’d like to be there to see their reactions.

2.  This is too easy.  First of all, it’s college, not high school.  Compare your senior year of high school to your freshman year of college - no parents, no curfews, no rules.  Enough said.  Second, Jake Bateman plays a cousin of Mickey Fox.  Different person, different background.  Abandoned by his parents, he has his own set of problems.  Lastly, the medium is boxing.  An individual sport.  I’ll go into more detail for #5.

3.  Wrong again.  Look at that college campus.  Jake Bateman didn’t come cheap, either.  You think Chubby came back for a few grand and free hot dogs?  Get real.  The cars were nicer, the girls were prettier, the lighting was better.  Quality with a capital TW.

4.  Okay, Mickey Fox is no De Niro, but when did he become a well respected acTOR?  That’s pronounced ac-TOR.  He’s Alex P. Keaton.  He made a fortune off being 5′3” and his voice never changing.  I like the kid, but he’s no acTOR.  Jake Bateman showed his chops in Arrested Development, a genius of a show.  He’s also teamed up with Vince Vaughn for a couple recent blockbusters.  Now Alex P. has the shakes and Jake’s agent’s phone is off the hook.  Jake > Mickey.  End of story.

5.  This was just a genius move by the writers.  The one premise that was played out was the teammates being upset in a team sport angle.  Now we have an individual sport, but in a team environment.  The only other options would have been tennis or golf.  But it’s not Teen Wus.  It’s Teen Wolf.  The entire dynamic changes.  The movie really breathes thanks to this decision.

Basically, TW2 suffers because TW1 was so bad.  The untrained viewer can’t watch it without framing it around the first movie.  It’s a little known fact, and I don’t want this getting out, but Mickey J. Fox wanted the lead for TW2.  But Jake was mad about how Mickey (Alex P.) treated his real life sister, Justine (Mallory), on Family Ties.   On the show, not in real life.  In real life, Mallory would give little Mickey the beating of his lifetime.  Anyway, Jake blackened Mickey’s eyes for him right before the auditions and the rest, as we know it, is history.

Guns N Roses Reunion

GNR reuniting? Could Axl, Slash, Duff and Izzy really play together again?

Okay, I’m not going to hold my breath on this one. But there have been rumblings this Spring every since an interview that GigWise.com did with former GNR drummer, Stevie Adler.

In the interview, Adler revealed that he recently buried the hatchet with Axl. Adler said, “I saw Axl, talked with him from ten or 12 at night to eight in the morning. We resolved a lot of s**t.”

Adler goes on to say that Axl has also been in talks with Slash, Duff and Izzy to try to resolve similar issues with them.

Adler said he told Rose, “You know the five of us have to get back together! That’s when it will really take off again! Nothing will be bigger. It would be the biggest reunion ever in history.” To which Adler said Axl just grinned and giggled a little bit.

Adler went on to say, “I’ve been talking with Slash. I’ve been talking with Izzy. He wants a reunion.”

So could it be possible that the best band in the World might be getting back together? Again, it would probably take a lot for the band to all forgive and forget. And there are still a couple of big factors that could stand in the way of a reunion of the original Guns N Roses.

First, Slash and company currently have their own Grammy award winning band, Velvet Revolver. Revolver is led by former Stone Temple Pilots frontman, Scott Weiland, and has a new album (Libertad) coming out in July 2007. So you would assume that the band plans to tour together in-support of the album. If that’s really the case, then how long will Axl be willing to wait for them to rejoin his band (GNR).

Second, Axl and the current version of Guns N Roses are rumored to be in the final stages of work on the LOOOOOOOONG awaited album, Chinese Democracy. So it’s hard to imagine that Axl would be willing to drop that project, so close to completion, to get the old band back together. Chinese Democracy has been in production for more than 10 years and is rumored to have cost $13 Million dollars to make. If that figure is true, it would be the most expensive album in the history of music.

So in my estimation the earliest the original Guns N Roses could reunite would be 2009. Figuring that once each current band releases their album, they go on-tour for the next year and a half, or so, in support of the album. And in February 2009 Axl will be turning 47 years old. Not exactly the normal age for a Rock N Roll star to hit the road on a “new” adventure…unless you are the Rolling Stones.

So all this boils down to the fact that I’m not holding my breath for a reunion of the original lineup of Guns N Roses. I think Axl is one of the baddest men on the planet, but I also know that he’s a stubborn, egocentric, asshole. And it’s very unlikely that he can change, or cover that up enough, to get Slash, Duff and Izzy to come back to join him.

But hey, there’s always YouTube. Where there is plenty of good Guns N Roses to watch.

Here is Guns N Roses live rendition of Paradise City from the Freddie Mercury tribute concert:

Now after watching that clip, try to tell me that Guns N Roses isn’t one of the greatest bands in history. I just hope I get to watch them together again someday.

Best DJ in the World

I’m going to go out on a limb here, but Nicky Belluchi is really good at what she does.  Does it really matter what music she plays?

I’ve got a birthday party for a buddy next week, and I’m thinking we may need a DJ to spice things up a bit.  Who needs clowns and balloons around when you can have Nicky?

Not sure what’s going on in the last picture, but it looks as though she makes sure that everyone at the party goes home happy.

Rolling Stone’s Keith Richards Drug of Choice?

So what exactly does Keith Richards prefer to snort?

Keith Richards, the legendary guitar player for the Rolling Stones, is notorious for his rampant drug use. So much that a comedian once quipped that Richards ‘did all of the drugs…so the only thing left to get high, was to roll Richards up and smoke him’.

Starting back in the 1960’s Richards used alcohol, marijuana, cocaine, heroin and more. Basically if there’s a drug out there in the world, then Keith Richards probably did it at some point (you could say the same for Mick Jagger and women).

But in a recent interview, Richards admitted the strangest thing that he ever snorted was his own father’s ashes. Richards father died in 2002 and was cremated. Richards apparently mixed some of the ashes of his father with some cocaine.

“The strangest thing I’ve tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father,” Richards was quoted as saying by British music magazine NME. “He was cremated and I couldn’t resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow. My dad wouldn’t have cared,” Richards said. “…It went down pretty well, and I’m still alive.”

[Update to this story: A Rolling Stones spokesperson has come out since the story ran and said that Keith Richards was joking. That it was an April Fool's Joke.]

Ozzy Osbourne’s Drug of Choice?
The other infamous “snorting” incident involved legendary Rock & Roll star, Ozzy Osbourne. While on tour with Motley Crue, Osbourne and Crue bass player, Nikki Sixx, got into a cocaine snorting contest. In order to win Osbourne lept off the tour bus and proceeded to snort a line of ants from a nearby anthill.

Osbourne’s other “craziest” drug story. Was when he got out crazy doing drugs and shot all of he and wife Sharon’s cats. Ozzie was found by Sharon underneath their piano, wearing a white suit and holding a shotgun and knife. Osbourne had murdered all 17 of their cats. Suffice to say Ozzy is not going to be getting any invites to PETA funcations anytime soon.

Result: Ozzy Osbourne and Keith Richards are some crazy sons of bitches.