Say it ain’t so Scarlett Johansson

A sad day for men all over the World, Scarlett Johansson is officially off the market.  Scarlett and Ryan Reynolds are engaged.

Hottie Scarlett Johansson is off the market (photo courtesy: AskMen)

I guess the only good news is that Scarlett has said she doesn’t believe in monogamy.  So maybe there’s still a chance…

No shirt, no shoes…just golf

I feel for you if you’re not a John Daly fan, because the guy has character. How many other pro golfers, or pro athletes, would play a round of golf with a reporter…and not put on their shoes or shirt?  Dennis Rodman?  John Riggins?  It’s gotta be a pretty short list. 

 How many “cold ones” do you think Daly had before filming this piece?

Ronaldo hooking up with trannies

A funny storysurfaced about international soccer star, Ronaldo, hooking up with a couple of transvestites.  Apparently he didn’t realize the chicks were she-males, but they knew who Ronaldo was.  Because the dudes tried to extort Ronaldo to keep the story out of the press.  I guess that plan, keeping it out of the press, didn’t work. 

My biggest reaction to this story had nothing to do with the trannies, because I hear they are quite deceptive in Brazil.  I was more shocked at how much Ronaldo has let himself go.  Ronaldo always had funky hair, but what the fuck is he thinking these days.

Ronaldo needs a haircut or a comb (photo courtesy of Brahsome)

Ashley Force & Danica Patrick separated at birth?

This past weekend Ashley Force became the first female driver to ever win an NHRA funny car event.  Ashley won the Summit Racing Equipment NHRA Southern Nationals in Commerce, Georgia.  Her win comes a few weeks after Danica Patrick became the first woman to ever win an Indy Car Race, which Danica’s win at the Japan 300.  Holy Natalie Gulbis, the hot chicks are finally starting to win.

So what got into these two lead footed hotties?  And a better question would be has anyone ever seen Ashley Force & Danica Patrick in the same room, at the same time?

Ashley Force

Danica Patrick

Truthfully I think Ashley Force is a lot hotter.  The big question is how long will it be until someone convinces Ashley, or one of her sisters below, to lean over the front of her car and show off her ass like Danica did for FHM magazine.  I’m predicting that day is coming very soon.

Danica Patrick showing off her ass crack for FHM magazine

Ashley’s sister, Brittany Force in red and her sister Courtney Force in blue

I’m proud that I got through that entire piece without using the phrase “she really knows how to work a gear shift”.  Who do you think is hotter - Danica Patrick or Ashley Force?

Reality TV Thong

Who said reality TV was bad?  I need to start watching Big Brother.

I bet you watch it more than once.  Have a great Friday!

 

Hottest Chick on new Big Break Hawaii?

The Golf Channel is doing another edition of their Big Break golf challenge from Hawaii.  This one called, Big Break Ka’anapali, features 12 female golfers competing for an exemption to an LPGA event.  The winner also has all of their entry fees paid for the LPGA mini-tour, wins some cash and a BMW.  So it’s a pretty big deal for the ladies competing.  And they’ve brought into some competitors who have extensive college or pro golf experience, including our own Sophie Sandolo.  You’ll remember Sophie from our feature on the hottest female golfers of 2007.

But when I watched the first episode I was struck by something more than their talent.  First, a few of these girls are hot.  Not just golfer hot, but genuinely good look women.  And second the Golf Channel cameras focus A LOT on the tits & ass of the different competitors.  The first competition had a few of the girls stripping down to their bikinis.  Then during the golf challenge there were quite a few tight shots on the breasts of the contestants.  And a few of these girls look to be hiding midgets under their shirts.

This formula isn’t entirely new for the Big Break.  They had a couple of nice looking girls in past seasons.  But for this season it appears they’ve made a big effort to find some of the best looking semi-pro golfers available.  I fully expect to see a guest appearance from LPGA star Natalie Gulbis this season.

So do I recommend checking out the Big Break Ka’anapali?  Definitely.  Golf fans will find the skills competitions fairly interesting.  And even if you don’t like golf, there are a couple of fine looking ladies who make it must see TV.  So which are the best looking ladies on the 2008 Big Break?  Below is a list, in order, of the finest lady golfers on the Big Break Ka’anapali.

**NOTE: I revised the rankings after watching a few episodes.  I reference the original rankings.  But the new rankings are based on what I saw of the girls on TV.**

Best Looking Chicks on the Big Break Ka’anapali:
1. Elizabeth Stuart (original rank: #2)
Exceptionally cute 27 year old from Tampa, Florida.  Did I mention she’s cute?  Plus she lists the Bucs as an interest, so she appears to like football.  Definitely a keeper.  She debuted lower when I first put together the list, but then I kept moving her up.  Finally I realized she’s not just cute, she’s hot…so she truly deserved the top spot.

Elizabeth Stuart

Elizabeth Stuart

2. Courtney Erdman (original rank #4)
Her husband gave up his own golf dreams to caddy for her…how sweet.  26 years old from Cali.  She’s got some fantastic assets.  Jumped from #4 to #2 after watching two episodes.

Courtney Erdman

Courtney Erdman

3. Tina Miller (original rank #1)
Hot blonde 25 year old from Miami, Florida.  Loves to exercise and it shows.  Recently engaged. Has her own website.  I think most guys wouldn’t mind carrying her bag for 36 holes.  Was my original #1, but she got passed up by the two above her.  The top 3 are all VERY close, because they are all really nice looking.

Tina Miller

Tina Miller

4. Christina Lecuyer (original rank #3)
A hot, athletic 26 old Canadian.  Another plus, she’s single and she used to be a bartender.  So it sounds like she’s not afraid to mix it up.

Christina Lecuyer

Christina Lecuyer

5. Sophie Sandolo 
Steamy French sexpot is a bit older than her top competitors, but still very hot for 32.  If you don’t believe me, check out some of her racy nude calendar photos.  She’s most likely to strip down naked to play a par 3 on the Big Break.

Sophie Sandolo

6. Cirbie Sheppard 
Let me start by saying I think this chick might be a little bit crazy.  She wears goth looking golf outfits and is into martial arts and “Legends of Zelda”.  But the 25 year old Californian might also be the most underrated girl on my list.  She’s one to watch as the show progresses.

Cirbie Sheppard

7. Kim Welch 
Exotic looking Californian is 25.  Also listed as single.

Kim Welch

8. Samantha Head 
An English chick with blonde hair, straight teeth, who’s single and plays golf.  Paging English Dave.  Samantha also gets bonus points for having an identical twin, which always is hot.

Samantha Head

9. Adrienne Gautreaux
27 year old from Dallas, Texas.  I’m not usually into curly redheads, but she’s got some talent.

Adrienne Gautreaux

10. I awarded tenth place as a tie between the other 3 contestants.

So now tell me how you’d rank them?

2008 Masters - The Grades

It was anticlimactic.  As much as I didn’t want it to be.  That’ll be the story of the 2008 Masters.  To the grades…

Trevor Immelman:  A 

Can’t say enough about finishing it off after sleeping on the lead three straight nights.  Nobody’s done that at Augusta since Seve in 1980.  Made a lot of clutch par putts and two outside the leather bogey putts - on 1 and 12.  Except for the tugged tee ball on 16, he played it about perfect.  I’m not saying he didn’t hit a loose shot here or there.  I guess the best way to put it is I can’t imagine Tiger doing a better job in the same position, in those conditions.

Did he deserve it?  Definitely.  Was it exciting?  Definitely not.

Tiger Woods:  C+

It wasn’t just the putter.  His ballstriking wasn’t nearly as sharp as it had been earlier this season.  Yes, the missed putts on 13 and 14 stalled the little momentum he had on the back Sunday.  But he never got in touch with the leaders Thursday or Friday.  He was overly cautious, playing too safe.  I understand the course is more demanding now (more on that later), but there were plenty of guys who took it low enough the first two days.  It’s like he knows too much.  Sometimes you just need to step up and hit it.  No slam this year.  Though he’s gaining on Nicklaus’s runner up record.  Only 14 more to go.  So he’s got that going for him.

Phil Mickelson:  B-

Scraped it all week.  Got a ton of good breaks.  The kind of breaks you need to win a big one.  But he was all over the property - and the putter didn’t behave.  It’s interesting that Tiger and Mickelson can seemingly be off form and notch top five finishes at Augusta.  Regardless of the set up or conditions.  While everyone else struggles to break 78.

Brandt “Nips” Snedeker:  A-

Other than the preordained collapse Sunday and the smuggled raisins Saturday, I’d say it’s a week to be proud of for young Brandt.  

 

Go ahead.  Try not to look at ‘em. 

The Course:  B+

When Tiger or Mickelson don’t win the green jacket, which isn’t often, the course tends to get more attention than the champion.  I’m not saying the changes are perfect.  Seems just about every player agrees that the 7th hole is screwed up - it’s way too long.  And maybe the rough could be a little shorter.  And, into the wind, only a few guys can reach 15.  That said, the scores this year were normal.  Everyone seems to forget when Tiger won in 1997, second place was -6.  That was with the course playing under 7000 yards, without rough, in light winds.  This year, with all the hoopla about the US Open conditions, -5 was second.  Jack Nicklaus won at Even in 1966, a year after he won with -17.  Point being, this isn’t a new dicussion, whether or not the course should play easy or hard.  It’s not a simple task, trying to keep up with technology.  It’s a guessing game.  And if the wind didn’t blow Sunday, double digits would have won. 

CBS:  C

Was it me or did that seem like more than three minutes of commercials every hour?  Didn’t even need my catheter.  Maybe it was unlucky timing, but they missed a lot of important live shots.  Nantz was quiet enough.  Verne Lundquist is legally senile.  I don’t hate that.

Masters.org:  A+

Sure, the video kept freezing.  But how can I complain when I get to watch Tiger Woods play Augusta from my desk at work when he’s not even on TV?  Brilliant.  They also caught shots CBS missed - most notably Tiger’s bomb on 11 Sunday.  That was a replay portrayed as live action, if you saw it on CBS.  The live scoring is top notch.  The sound bites were great.  The conversation between Stevie and Tiger from the 15th fairway was an absolute gem.  Tiger waiting for the wind to die… 

Stevie:  “You can’t reach right now.”

Tiger:  “I’m not going  to lay up.” 

Stevie:  “I know.”

———

Bring on Torrey Pines.

2008 Masters - Sunday

Just a quick thought or two…

Immelman’s not just playing against the field.  Augusta has more graves than green jackets… 

1.   There hasn’t been a wire to wire champion in decades. 

2.  Nobody has ever shot four rounds in the 60s, which is mind boggling considering it’s happened at the US Open (year in year out, a much more difficult task) - twice. 

3.  Balls don’t stop short of the 15th green.  That’s the luckiest break I’ve seen in a long, long time at a major.  That ball goes in the water, he’s got a lot of work to do for double.  But more important than the strokes lost would have been the trauma of it all.  See:   Justin Rose on Friday on the very same hole.  His tournament ended in 57 seconds.

4.  The weather is brutal today.  20mph winds + Sunday pressure + Augusta’s greens = potential for a big number on every hole.

Despite all that, and the experts giving it to Tiger, Immelman holds the cards.  He shoots under par, a monumental task, he wins.  If he doesn’t…

Snedeker.  Extemely likeable.   No chance.  He’ll be the happy little anecdote of the 2008 Masters.  I like the guy.  Maybe he’ll get a green jacket in five or ten years.

Flesch.  Fits your journeyman role.  No chance.  He wins this year’s awful taste award.  Can his sponsors get him one article of clothing that didn’t come off the rack in 1993?  Just happy to be here.  In his overly pleated pants, stiff hat, and long sleeved short sleeve shirt.

Casey.  Maybe.  Been here a few times - kinda.  Winds are the norm on the Euro Tour.  Capable of shooting good rounds in very difficult conditions.  Sunday pressure, however, is the x factor.  It’s one thing to be a threat.  It’s another to have the lead or a share of it standing on the 12th tee Sunday in a monsoon.  Nevertheless, I like his chances.

Tiger.  He’s gotta be thinking 67.  Unless it becomes apparent early that the course is nearly unplayable.  {As this goes to press, the guys playing right now are handling it okay, nobody worse than +1.  But the winds are supposed double in an hour or so.  And most of the guys have only played a few holes.}  He’ll be leaderboard watching very, very closely.  In the third to last group, every single thing he does, good or bad, will be known by the last four guys. 

They won’t need to see the leaderboard to know what’s going on.

Tennis superstar + hack golfer = love?

ESPN.com had a column about Trip Kuehne’s last time playing the Masters.  The column, by Gene “Prone to Sensationalism” Wojciechowski, was a trip down memory lane to a time when Trip lost to Tiger Woods in the US Amateur.

But it wasn’t the part about Trip or Tiger that caught my attention.  What made me say ‘what?’ was reading that Venus Williams was in Trip’s gallery.  So now I’m confused why a Wimblendon is following around an amateur golfer.  Did Venue get lost trying to find Ernie or Phil’s group?  Did Trip win one of those ‘hang with a star for a day’ that Make-A-Wish does?  Did Venus forget her glasses and think “Trip Kuehne” said “Tiger Woods”?

The story reveals that Venus is there with Trip’s brother, Hank Kuehne.  Hank’s a professional golfer who has yet to make hay on the Nationwide Tour.  So I’m thinking that maybe Hank retired from golf and is persuing a career as a sports agent.  Maybe he’s trying to woo Venue to be one of his clients.  Wrong again.

Turns out Hank Kuehne and Venus Williams are an item.  They’ve been dating for some time, and purportedly (Wikipedia) got engaged in January.  I was a bit surprised by this discovery.  Not because he’s white and she’s black, that’s not an issue.  But because she’s a superstar athlete and he’s just a regular athlete, and “regular” might be stretching it if he doesn’t win a few Nationwide events soon.

Is there anything wrong with an attractive female, megastar tennis player dating a Q School regular?  No, but I guess I figured Venue would have her pick of top-shelf athletes and celebrities.  After all her sister, Serena, dated NBA-star Chris Webber, mega-producer Brett Ratner and rapper Common.  So I just assumed big sis Venus would have a bigger name boyfriend/fiance/husband.

Nothing against Hank, I’m sure he’s a fantastic guy (although I think Coach takes him with 2 a side).  I guess it just proves that relationships are hard to predict.  So now I must wish Hank & Venus success in their marriage & life.

Venus Williams & Hank Kuehne

Bar Rafaeli or Petra Nemcova?

If you took their best photo, I think you’d go with Petra.

But if you just looked at this photo, I’d say Bar.  That little peek at her bra does it all for me.

Oh, and the height discrepancy isn’t that big, if any.  Petra’s in flats and Bar is rocking some Christian Louboutin stilettos.  I know you can’t see them here, but trust me.  There are several other pics floating around out there to back me up.  I was just too lazy to post them here.